Titles are for the confused

Things you won't read on Perez:

1. Which Springdoiker's web site is having a big 1st birthday bash on 8/17?

2. Which Springdoiker is taking a "zero" day?

3. Which Springdoiker made chocolate chip pancakes?

4. Which Springdoiker thinks he has a kidney stone?

5. Which Springdoiker is going on a vacation without anyother Springdoikers in tow?

6. Which Springdoiker got not one, but two new pairs of Crocs?